I’m already on OKCupid, and I have been messaging someone on there. But I was more interested in looking for friends or even just intellectually interesting acquaintances. Doesn’t have to be single or of the opposite sex :)
OKC is probably not a good venue for making friends since that’s not what most people signing up for it primarily intend. The context of interaction is tainted with romance.
I agree with you that its a false dichotomy, but I’m not entirely sure that I can become friends with a girl on OKC who is not otherwise attracted to me. In my mind, she’s not here looking for friends, she’s looking for potential suitors, and if I’m not one, she simply doesn’t respond or responds in a perfunctory manner, and never invests the time that would be required to make a new friend. If she does, our friendship is tainted by the knowledge that I am attracted to her (otherwise I wouldn’t have contacted her in the first place), and then we’re in the age old question from countless romcom chick flicks.
Yes, it’s possible, but if the objective is to maximize close friendships made per time spent socializing, OKC is not the most efficient way to do so. meetup.com is.
Include the phrase “no homo” somewhere in the message. Actually, I’ve both messaged and been messaged by guys on OKC, and as far as I know, neither of us thought there was anything romantic going on.
I’m already on OKCupid, and I have been messaging someone on there. But I was more interested in looking for friends or even just intellectually interesting acquaintances. Doesn’t have to be single or of the opposite sex :)
OKC is also not bad for this! I know lots of people who have made friends from the site, though I haven’t personally.
OKC is probably not a good venue for making friends since that’s not what most people signing up for it primarily intend. The context of interaction is tainted with romance.
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I agree with you that its a false dichotomy, but I’m not entirely sure that I can become friends with a girl on OKC who is not otherwise attracted to me. In my mind, she’s not here looking for friends, she’s looking for potential suitors, and if I’m not one, she simply doesn’t respond or responds in a perfunctory manner, and never invests the time that would be required to make a new friend. If she does, our friendship is tainted by the knowledge that I am attracted to her (otherwise I wouldn’t have contacted her in the first place), and then we’re in the age old question from countless romcom chick flicks.
Yes, it’s possible, but if the objective is to maximize close friendships made per time spent socializing, OKC is not the most efficient way to do so. meetup.com is.
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I guess I never tried this. It would be weird though. How do I message another guy, for instance, without that guy thinking that I’m hitting on him?
Include the phrase “no homo” somewhere in the message. Actually, I’ve both messaged and been messaged by guys on OKC, and as far as I know, neither of us thought there was anything romantic going on.
Well, how do you message a woman without that woman thinking you’re hitting on her?
I suspect many of the same techniques would apply.
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