Is all of this really supposed to be a description of actual people? Or what?
FYI this reads as incredulity-as-attack, when you might have instead written ‘I’m surprised, because as far as I know, none of the people I’ve ever met think or behave like that’ which would have contained the same critique but come across as 3x less dick
edit: it seems in the spirit of the thread to unroll a little more. Your first comment seemed to say something like ‘I’m confused by the words you used,’ which when I read it I felt good about that. But then when it was explained enough so that ‘I’m confused’ was no longer a concern, you immediately switched tacks to be complaining about something else, without acknowledging that your first concern had been addressed or that your second concern was a brand-new complaint.
That made me think that you just didn’t like this, and were going to find reasons to keep not liking it. I had a model that neither of your explicit complaints thus far was your true complaint, and that made me feel like you were being uncooperative and so I also felt less-inclined-to-cooperate. Then I checked your words again to see whether they were more compatible with “trying to understand” or with “trying to socially dominate” and if I had to bet I would bet on the latter, and that’s where my comment came from.
I guess it’s possible I’m missing or misinterpreting stuff. But now you have something to work with if you want it.
Somehow this comment was really inspiring! I’m glad this exchange happened, so maybe I should upvote grandparent too? :P
BTW,
incredulity-as-attack
[not] acknowledging that your first concern had been addressed
We have terms for these! They are, respectively, stonewalling and logical rudeness.
I’m still split on how I feel about jargon, and of course it’s good that you didn’t use any here, but it does give the concepts you describe some legitimacy (for better or worse). Legitimacy helps especially in cases where such expressions are dismissed as over-reactions unique to you, and are thus assumed to be your responsibility to fix, by some implicit jargon-efficiency argument (“if this were a thing to be concerned about, we’d have a name for it!”).
FYI this reads as incredulity-as-attack, when you might have instead written ‘I’m surprised, because as far as I know, none of the people I’ve ever met think or behave like that’ which would have contained the same critique but come across as 3x less dick
edit: it seems in the spirit of the thread to unroll a little more. Your first comment seemed to say something like ‘I’m confused by the words you used,’ which when I read it I felt good about that. But then when it was explained enough so that ‘I’m confused’ was no longer a concern, you immediately switched tacks to be complaining about something else, without acknowledging that your first concern had been addressed or that your second concern was a brand-new complaint.
That made me think that you just didn’t like this, and were going to find reasons to keep not liking it. I had a model that neither of your explicit complaints thus far was your true complaint, and that made me feel like you were being uncooperative and so I also felt less-inclined-to-cooperate. Then I checked your words again to see whether they were more compatible with “trying to understand” or with “trying to socially dominate” and if I had to bet I would bet on the latter, and that’s where my comment came from.
I guess it’s possible I’m missing or misinterpreting stuff. But now you have something to work with if you want it.
Somehow this comment was really inspiring! I’m glad this exchange happened, so maybe I should upvote grandparent too? :P
BTW,
We have terms for these! They are, respectively, stonewalling and logical rudeness.
I’m still split on how I feel about jargon, and of course it’s good that you didn’t use any here, but it does give the concepts you describe some legitimacy (for better or worse). Legitimacy helps especially in cases where such expressions are dismissed as over-reactions unique to you, and are thus assumed to be your responsibility to fix, by some implicit jargon-efficiency argument (“if this were a thing to be concerned about, we’d have a name for it!”).