#3 Can be decomposed into many parts. Most of them contingent on your relationship with the person, and your use of terminology.
As a sort of aside, being an effective communicator can depend on your understanding the other persons frame of reference, and working to not use terms they are unlikely to know. This often depends on specific social dynamics, but you can frame it like “In my field there is this concept XYZ, I’m sure you’ve heard of it, and blah blah.” This way you give them the benefit of the doubt, but also give them a way to not feel bad as you note it’s in your field. I know this might feel strange to do when you yourself never take stuff personally—to that I can only offer sympathy.
...On the other hand, most complicated terminology or jargon often references a semi-complex phenomena. It’s often not fair, at all, to expect others to know or follow it. Sometimes the person speaking uses it to give their argument an authoritative veneer, because the other person doesn’t know or can’t respond. If people get that impression they sometimes get angry.
Anyway, I’d encourage you to maybe be more empathetic towards other people in these instances. People often are ‘crazy,’ but it’s best to assume they aren’t until you’ve really, really, tried to see their model of the world.
My utility from eating meat is b(X=1) My utility from the world not being destroyed is Y So...
Utility = X + E[Y|X=1] vs. Utility = E[Y| X=0]
Obviously you’re able to disagree with my model. But in my self-consistent model of the world the benefit I get from eating meat is greater than the utility I achieve from lowering the likelihood the world is destroyed (in any given timeframe) by not eating meat.
I strongly suspect you will have a hard time convincing me I’m wrong without appealing to moral imperatives. Obviously there isn’t some mathematically elegant and clearly distinct line between rationality and moral imperative, but hey, if there was Less Wrong probably wouldn’t exist.