This has been proven to me on multiple occasions when I have done relatively “transgressive” things in public, things like jumping fences, and been surprised that no strangers noticed.
I find social invisibility one of the most deeply depressing aspects of modernity. It is a minor weight on my days.
“Personally I recommend making peace with it and finding a way to enjoy life anyway, but that’s harder for some people than others.”
I dislike the term “make peace with it.” You “make peace” with an opponent by no longer fighting them, but most people aren’t fighting social invisibility at all. Maybe if they did, say, by trying to become visibly famous or dressing in a strange way, they would be happier. I know multiple people who’ve successfully done this.
If you hate social invisibility, you can do something about it. I recommend moving to a community where you’re not invisible. Join a group house, make friends with your neighbors, or move to a small community where everyone knows each other.
This has been proven to me on multiple occasions when I have done relatively “transgressive” things in public, things like jumping fences, and been surprised that no strangers noticed.
I guess it can be hard to distinguish between “no strangers noticed”, “someone noticed but didn’t care”, and “someone noticed, cared, but didn’t react”. I once saw someone do a wall backflip in public, and thought it was cool, but he presumably didn’t notice me notice him.
I feel like jumping a fence is pretty likely to be noticed—though not shocking if it isn’t, depending how many people are around. But even if someone does notice, and dislikes that you’re doing it, what are they gonna do?
So distinguishing between them also doesn’t usually matter.
Indeed, when I encounter strangers who behave in unusual ways I sometimes make an effort not to look like I notice them even though I do, as “behaves unusual” tends to make them unpredictable and usually I’m not interested in “provoking” them. Sure, that person climbing a fence in plain sight of the public may just be some friendly rationalist to whom I could express my curiosity about their endeavors, but they may also be some kind of unhinged person without self control, what do I know.
So, maybe I would even reframe invisibility—in some settings at least—to something like “don’t care & don’t trust & can’t be bothered to engage”.
This has been proven to me on multiple occasions when I have done relatively “transgressive” things in public, things like jumping fences, and been surprised that no strangers noticed.
I find social invisibility one of the most deeply depressing aspects of modernity. It is a minor weight on my days.
I dislike the term “make peace with it.” You “make peace” with an opponent by no longer fighting them, but most people aren’t fighting social invisibility at all. Maybe if they did, say, by trying to become visibly famous or dressing in a strange way, they would be happier. I know multiple people who’ve successfully done this.
If you hate social invisibility, you can do something about it. I recommend moving to a community where you’re not invisible. Join a group house, make friends with your neighbors, or move to a small community where everyone knows each other.
I guess it can be hard to distinguish between “no strangers noticed”, “someone noticed but didn’t care”, and “someone noticed, cared, but didn’t react”. I once saw someone do a wall backflip in public, and thought it was cool, but he presumably didn’t notice me notice him.
I feel like jumping a fence is pretty likely to be noticed—though not shocking if it isn’t, depending how many people are around. But even if someone does notice, and dislikes that you’re doing it, what are they gonna do?
So distinguishing between them also doesn’t usually matter.
Indeed, when I encounter strangers who behave in unusual ways I sometimes make an effort not to look like I notice them even though I do, as “behaves unusual” tends to make them unpredictable and usually I’m not interested in “provoking” them. Sure, that person climbing a fence in plain sight of the public may just be some friendly rationalist to whom I could express my curiosity about their endeavors, but they may also be some kind of unhinged person without self control, what do I know.
So, maybe I would even reframe invisibility—in some settings at least—to something like “don’t care & don’t trust & can’t be bothered to engage”.