I have a few thoughts on this, though I have strong anti-advertising sentiments and might be overly sensitive to these things, so take it with a grain of salt.
The title sounds a little click baity. It’s directed at the reader. The title “Do patients need years of therapy, or can one conversation resolve their issue?” is functionally identical, but feels less like an advert.
The opening reads somewhat like a common advert tactic: “I hated how business did [thing x] since it was bad for the customer, so I started my practice by doing [thing y] which is both more appealing to a potential customer and delivers better results!’.
I think the advertising vibe might also come from the continued references to your personal practice / mentions of it’s successes:
Oh I like “patients” (“clients”). I’ll think about the rest, thanks. I’m just not sure how to write anything useful and legible without talking about my own experience and what I have the most data for?
Also I see the point of your last bullet where “my business” is the subject hm
Hey Chris!
I have a few thoughts on this, though I have strong anti-advertising sentiments and might be overly sensitive to these things, so take it with a grain of salt.
The title sounds a little click baity. It’s directed at the reader. The title “Do patients need years of therapy, or can one conversation resolve their issue?” is functionally identical, but feels less like an advert.
The opening reads somewhat like a common advert tactic: “I hated how business did [thing x] since it was bad for the customer, so I started my practice by doing [thing y] which is both more appealing to a potential customer and delivers better results!’.
I think the advertising vibe might also come from the continued references to your personal practice / mentions of it’s successes:
“So when I started my business, I made payment contingent on results:”
“Our clients are often surprised at how we do things because it’s so different than the therapy or other coaching they’ve done before:”
“Several of my clients have resolved lifelong issues like anxiety in one shot”
“My business is expanding to help more people in deeper and more efficient ways.”
Finally, it concludes with a link to where people can schedule a call with you.
Oh I like “patients” (“clients”). I’ll think about the rest, thanks. I’m just not sure how to write anything useful and legible without talking about my own experience and what I have the most data for?
Also I see the point of your last bullet where “my business” is the subject hm