Cultural constructions of gender, like biologically-defined sex, also have significant weaknesses as prospective cues for social interaction with individuals. Yes, we’re all swimming in the same cultural soup, but different people perceive different parts of it more clearly, or have different parts emphasized more during their formative years, or whatever—the result is that different women can have surprisingly different takes on what it means to be female in our culture and how they as individuals relate to those cultural norms.
As a result, you really can’t go wrong by approaching social interactions with women as if they were social interactions with human beings.
Gender and sex are far more useful retrospectively than prospectively. If in your best efforts to make your way through this world of human beings, you encounter a problem that you believe you cannot solve without adding the variable of sex/gender to the equation, go ahead and try it and see if it illuminates anything. But which facet should you look to first—sex or gender?
It is my personal and potentially-biased belief that in the realm of human psychology, looking to gender first rather than sex is going to be more useful to you in the long run. Let me explain: if a woman or multiple women do or say something that you don’t understand, can’t agree with, doesn’t fit your perception of reality, etc., you can ask, “I wonder if this is because women are different?” Well, what if the answer is yes? What does that buy you? You (not the abstract you, I mean you the bloggers) seem convinced that there is a neurological gap that you cannot bridge. So if the answer is “Women are different!” you throw up your hands and give up.
Instead, you could ask, “I wonder if this is because women typically experience certain things in our culture that are different from what men experience?” CONCRETE EXPERIENCES ARE SOMETHING THAT YOU CAN IMAGINE. Experiences are something that you can read about, ask questions about, educate yourself about. Then you can put yourself in the “female” position: “Would a human being who had those experiences look at this problem differently than a human being who had my experiences?”
If you approach this process honestly and openly, you will be surprised at the “mysteries” that suddenly become clear to you. Good luck.
To continue:
Cultural constructions of gender, like biologically-defined sex, also have significant weaknesses as prospective cues for social interaction with individuals. Yes, we’re all swimming in the same cultural soup, but different people perceive different parts of it more clearly, or have different parts emphasized more during their formative years, or whatever—the result is that different women can have surprisingly different takes on what it means to be female in our culture and how they as individuals relate to those cultural norms.
As a result, you really can’t go wrong by approaching social interactions with women as if they were social interactions with human beings.
Gender and sex are far more useful retrospectively than prospectively. If in your best efforts to make your way through this world of human beings, you encounter a problem that you believe you cannot solve without adding the variable of sex/gender to the equation, go ahead and try it and see if it illuminates anything. But which facet should you look to first—sex or gender?
It is my personal and potentially-biased belief that in the realm of human psychology, looking to gender first rather than sex is going to be more useful to you in the long run. Let me explain: if a woman or multiple women do or say something that you don’t understand, can’t agree with, doesn’t fit your perception of reality, etc., you can ask, “I wonder if this is because women are different?” Well, what if the answer is yes? What does that buy you? You (not the abstract you, I mean you the bloggers) seem convinced that there is a neurological gap that you cannot bridge. So if the answer is “Women are different!” you throw up your hands and give up.
Instead, you could ask, “I wonder if this is because women typically experience certain things in our culture that are different from what men experience?” CONCRETE EXPERIENCES ARE SOMETHING THAT YOU CAN IMAGINE. Experiences are something that you can read about, ask questions about, educate yourself about. Then you can put yourself in the “female” position: “Would a human being who had those experiences look at this problem differently than a human being who had my experiences?”
If you approach this process honestly and openly, you will be surprised at the “mysteries” that suddenly become clear to you. Good luck.